Here’s something a little different for ya, so grab a cup of something hot, cold, or lukewarm as the case may be and settle in. If you’ve been around these parts long enough, you’ve heard me talk about our friends, the Morrells. Mark and Ashley are a videography parenting team of humans in Homer, New York who met in a high school English classroom out toward Rochester. The quick version? There was high school, college, engagement, marriage, two kids, a pup, two dream jobs, and a few more years then you see these (really cool) images celebrating their 10 year anniversary.
But there’s so much more in the middle.
Messy, molding, and momentous things that make up the middle and make up their experience, their family, and who they are.
My favorite part about their story is I’ve had the opportunity to see a lot of it unfold up close and personally. Jon and I met them the summer after their wedding when Ashley hired him as a Resident Assistant and eventually helped plan out a do-you-like-me-circle-yes-or-no-type girlfriend proposal but with, like, a lot of homemade flair. It was involved, people.
Anyway.
We bonded.
And we’ve been friends ever since.
I asked her to share a few nuggets of wisdom mostly for myself, but hey why not share the wealth?
If you’re married or have learned something helpful in regard to cultivating healthy relationships, I’d love to hear what you have to say – shoot me a message. I’ll be compiling a list and writing a series on all these findings. Maybe interviewing other friends? We’ll see.
Let’s dive in.
What are three tips to cultivating a healthy marriage you’ve learned in your ten years?
Hear from Ashley Morrell of Moved By You Videography:
#1 SUPPORT EACH OTHER
“This is Mark’s biggest priority for our marriage. He aims to support me in all I do – business, running, and in our finances to name a few. It makes him feel good when I support him in ways like cheering him on during a busy week, talking through classroom ideas, and listening to his struggles at work.”
#2 BE HONEST AND VULNERABLE
“Usually when I get upset, I can snap or be short tempered. But recently during a hard moment, I let go of my pride, found him, and cried and cried and cried as he held me. I ran to him, squeezed, and just let him take care of me. I could have kept it bottled up and let it ruin my mood for the day, but instead I went to him in vulnerability.”
#3 MAKE TIME FOR EACH OTHER
“Sometimes you have to say “no” to other things in order to say “yes” to each other. Whether it’s a night you don’t play video games and edit photos in order to spend time together. Or say no to the volunteer thing at church or the extra job if you’re too busy or the friend hangout or the small group meeting. Mark and I say no to a lot of things in order to prioritize us. Sometimes we feel guilty about it. Sometimes we say yes when we should say no, but we still say no a lot. And it helps.”
I’m working on embedding these things into my own marriage and hope you’ll join me. Get your own mic-drop advice bombs together and send ‘em my way. I don’t know about you, but the chaos of 2020 has been exposing some stuff and I’m ready to make some moves. How about you?
